Solo mother hen from Kuruman, Northern Cape writes…

Liewe Lulu

I am 41, farm with chickens and am currently single. I have two sons and run my farm with the help of four workers.  

I am not exactly looking for a man, but my relationship status is a hot topic amongst my staff. I consider them my family. The majority are male and regularly ask me why I have no man taking care of me or why I am not married yet. I always feel like I must answer their questions and defend myself.

I have never been married and things did not work out with the father of my kids. I have tried the whole dating thing but really do not have the time and I am in no rush to settle down as a single mother.

How do I navigate these kinds of questions?

Mother Hen, my dearest

Weitse, you are well within your rights to be bothered by such invasive questioners.

Nosy people are unbearable and terribly persistent in their probing. They’ll have you wanting to pull your hair out and wonder what ever happened to minding the business that pays you?

It is important to understand that these questions will never stop. I mean you get married and then what? They wonder why you were a spinster for so long.

The day society becomes comfortable with the notion of a woman not aspiring to marriage is likely going to be the day it pours literal cats and dogs. It would be a miracle, or a marvel even!

You do know that you do not have to respond to rubbish questions from nincompoops right, Henny darling?

The only solution to your gossiping workers’ probes would be to “flip the script”.

As of this moment you are an expert script flipper. A simple “buzz off” or, if you are trying to be nicer and polite, try, “Sounds like you are interested in my personal life. What does it have to do with you?” That might shut the probers down!