Island Farmer Girl from Tzaneen, Limpopo writes…
Liewe Lulu
Can you give clarity on what Girl Code is? I seem to be a bad “girlfriend” because I am always landing myself in hot water with my friends. I farm full-time, have been called insensitive, busy and judgemental. I can’t keep up with all these friendship rules.
I am 29, so you would think that I’d have a clue, but what are the rules among girlfriends? What lines shouldn’t be crossed, because it feels like I ruffle feathers a lot of the times.
Dearest Island Farmer…
Darling, now an old woman of your age is far too experienced to follow anything called a “Girl Code”.
That’s for TikTokers, babes. And adulthood is hard enough.
What a woman of your stature adheres to is what we call the “Grown Ass Woman Code.” It’s a set of unwritten and ironclad rules that you simply must follow when you are a grown ass woman.
The standard rules include:
- Never hate a woman you have never met. Us gals have a lot going on, and a woman hating another woman just because she heard somebody tell somebody her business is a tool of patriarchy.
- You are not allowed to leave a sloppy drunk gal pal alone in a club or bar.
- Always be hyping your girl up in a public setting. Never try to steal your friend’s thunder when she is having a moment. When she’s on, give her room! In fact, pound the tables! Bang your glass with a spoon! Laugh the loudest at her story! Hype her up.
- Never stay silent when a friend is falling for an asshole. It is your duty to sound the alarm.
- Your friends’ exes are off-limits, no matter how much they set your loins on fire.
- Secrets are secret. You can never repeat something said in confidence.
- Never agree with a friend who says that she’s too fat, thin or ugly. Tell her ass to shut up. Life is too short. Drink, and be merry.
- You can never invite your friend’s enemy out.
- Never treat other women disrespectfully, it gives men ideas…
