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in Liewe Lulu

Liewe Lulu: I started a business, but now I have doubts…

by Noluthando Ngcakani
9th October 2020
The world is full of naysayers.  People who are in the business of misunderstanding you can never stand in the way of you and your dreams. Photo: FFM

The world is full of naysayers. People who are in the business of misunderstanding you can never stand in the way of you and your dreams. Photo: FFM

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Slowly Cracking, from Makhanda in the Eastern Cape writes…

Liewe Lulu…

Serious question!?

Does life get any better after I cave into pressure and live my life the way society had intended?

At every family event, I am hounded by aunts and uncles who ask uncomfortable, probing questions like, “when are you going to get a real job?”

“When are you getting married Sisanda? Your friends have husbands.”

Even worse yet, “when will you have kids? Your friends have children.”

They make me feel as if I have failed in life, and I am only 24.

I own a small business selling vegetables and fruit. After graduating I did not see myself working in an office.

Although, my family’s vicious comparisons now have me doubting myself, filling my mind with regrets. The little voice in my head is also now refusing to shut up, telling me I made a mistake.

Family is supposed to give their support. Instead mine thinks I am dumb for not living according to their standards. Please help…

Cracked, my dearest egg…

Who other than you is to say who or what you are meant to be?

No one can answer that question or act it out but you, my baby.

It was world fashion icon and powerhouse Diane von Furstenberg who once said: “when you doubt your power, you give power to your doubts.”

Those silly fears and doubts have an unsettling dexterity about them. Resembling a fungus rotting at your vision as you succumb to their will.

Liewe Lulu is feeling a little quote heavy, but it was also Uncle William S who once said: “Doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt.”

A cruel fact of life, the world is full of naysayers. You can never allow those who are in the business of misunderstanding you to stand in the way of you and your visions.

You don’t owe anyone sh*t. And how you chose to live out your life is your bloody business.

Now repeat after me… “Be gone, Imposter. Be gone.”

Add a flick of the wrist as you cast out that ugly Imposter Syndrome who has become an unwelcomed guest in your heart at the behest of your silly family.

Cracked, my lamb, keep dreaming. When you dream you have nothing to lose.

E-mail your fave no-holds-barred agri agony aunt

[contact-form to=”noluthando@foodformzansi.co.za” subject=”Liewe Lulu, please help…”][contact-field label=”Name” type=”name” required=”1″][contact-field label=”Message” type=”textarea”][/contact-form]

Noluthando Ngcakani

With roots in the Northern Cape, this Kimberley Diamond has had a passion for telling human interest stories since she could speak her first words. A foodie by heart, she began her journalistic career as an intern at the SABC where she discovered her love for telling agricultural, community and nature related stories. Not a stranger to a challenge Ngcakani will go above and beyond to tell your truth.

Tags: Advice ColumnImposter SyndromeLiewe Lulurelationship advice
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