Nervous piggy from Danielskuil, Northern Cape writes…

Liewe Lulu,

I am a 40-year-old, single pig farmer and have only had three girlfriends in my lifetime. While physically there is nothing wrong with me, I am afraid to approach women. I cannot get over the nervousness that I feel.

What can I do to overcome the fear that I feel?

My Dearest Piggy,

It is not the women that you fear but the rejection, my love.

And what you need to do is convince your brain that that rejection is not that big a deal.

Everyone fears rejection, it happens.

Women are not complicated really. So, it is a pandemic, but when you are out and about running errands and spot a lady, simply say hello.

Do not be thirsty though. Read the room. Anyways, some will give weird, disgusted glares, some will not respond, and some may even be a little rude to you.

When you get comfortable doing that, enter phase two: strike up a young conversation with women you are unlikely to ever meet again. Keep it short and vague; the pandemic is always a hot topic! Please, no compliments, the aim is not to be creepy here.

And if she is not interested in engaging in contact with you, back the hell up. It is not personal. If she is open to further contact, ask for her number.

Since you cannot really do date things, try virtual pre-dates.

Get creative. Again, if there is no interest, move on.

If you are so lucky to make it to the level where you can ask her out on a real date, make sure you have planned and put thought into it. Please, none of that “come to my place” sh*t!

Rejection is not the end of the world and will not kill you. If any woman does that to you then it is a blessing. Move on.

Respect yourself, respect women and don’t be such a worry wort. And also good luck my sexy farmer!