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in Liewe Lulu, Lifestyle

Liewe Lulu: Feeling pressured into a relationship

by Noluthando Ngcakani
29th May 2020
Liewe Lulu, I have feelings for him but I am not in love with him...

Liewe Lulu, I have feelings for him but I am not in love with him...

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Cold Little Heart from Kimberley in the Northern Cape writes…. 

Liewe Lulu, 

I think I am broken. I seem to have forgotten what it is like to be in love. I am a 28-year-old woman who has been single for years. I have looked for a couple of dates on Tinder. I found them. I have met some fine gents amongst the many frogs on the app. Men who were willing to go above and beyond to make sure that I am happy. And there was one who almost got through my frozen heart. The problem is I do not think I am able to give the love back. Please help, I have feelings for this man, but I am not in love with him.   

My Dearest Cold Little Heart… 

Who in the world said you must be in love with this man or any man at this very minute? Protect your heart at all costs and revel in the liberty of self-discovery in your 20’s, nana.  

Love should never be rushed, especially when you are feeling pressured. Let love find you and don’t be fooled by faux loneliness.  

The worst thing you could ever do is force yourself to love another. It’s not only unfair to you, but to your potential mate as well. Tell this man that you need time to learn to love, and to want to love him especially. If he says that this is not enough to make him stay in a relationship with you, then by all means go about your merry way and separate.  

Love is a precious commodity, so wait until you are ready to give it to the right person. 

Noluthando Ngcakani

With roots in the Northern Cape, this Kimberley Diamond has had a passion for telling human interest stories since she could speak her first words. A foodie by heart, she began her journalistic career as an intern at the SABC where she discovered her love for telling agricultural, community and nature related stories. Not a stranger to a challenge Ngcakani will go above and beyond to tell your truth.

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From left: Jeremia Mathebula (vice-chairperson of Grain SA); Dr Jack Bloom (deputy minister of water and sanitation); Falon Mars (Mars Rossouw Attorneys INC); and André Cloete (award-winning Overberg farmer). All four are part of the lineup for the special emerging farmers’ programme at Nampo Cape. Photos: Supplied/Food For Mzansi
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