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Liewe Lulu: Where do I go from here?

4th September 2020
Andile Matukane, founder of Farmers Choice and Devroll Legodi, founder of Devroll Herbs, joined a recent session of Food For Mzansi’s Gather To Grow on twitter o discuss the cultivation of spring onions in Mzansi. Photo: Supplied/Food For Mzansi

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Liewe Lulu: Where do I go from here?

by Noluthando Ngcakani
4th September 2020
in Liewe Lulu
Reading Time: 2 mins read
A A

The pain and the agony of a heartbreak can do either one or two things, it can make you bitter or propel you into a new and improved you, emerging stronger and wiser, says Liewe Lulu. Photo: FFM

Lost in limbo from Klerksdorp in the North West writes…

Liewe Lulu,

I have just gone through my first real heartbreak and I honestly don’t know where to go from here.

I met Vic early this year and for a while, things were going great. I was happy. That is until she returned. A lover from his past.

To say the least, I trusted him. I should not have. End of story.

Even as we broke up, he swore it was not about her but a few days later after we ended it, I found out he had cheated on me. With her.

I lost parts of myself that I am yearning to get back.

I feel like I am in some sort of weird limbo, just floating in a void right now.

How do I keep going on with my life? I’m so lonely, my family is on the other side of the country. No part of me wants to go back because I know I deserve better than what I got from him, but what exactly does moving forward mean?

How do I get to the next and better part of my life?

Limbo, my dearest,

And so, it ended in tears. Come here my angel, let aunty Lulu give you a big virtual hug. And a Mybulin of course.

Pain relievers work on emotional as well as physical pain, you know. Just one, not many now!

A nice glass of champers is twice as effective. “When love arrives, we expect champagne. When love goes, we need it,” as the adage goes.

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Break-ups are terrible. They are debilitating, even when handled with compassion. The rejection can shake your very foundations and leave you questioning your confidence, your faith in love or, worse yet, your worth.

But you is money baby, just BTW.

The reality is, though, that breakups are often the shattering preamble to a new improved life. S**t literally gets better after you eventually get over that dust mite.

But you have also got every right to feel inconsolable and in time you will move onwards and upwards.

So, FEEL! Don’t avoid. Grieve, my baby. Take all those feelings and let them out.

Once you have purged the remnants of your piece of trash ex, you will feel whole again, and in the most unexpected ways, at that.

Also, you don’t need those parts back, go forth and reinvent yourself, let him keep those lost pieces. The path towards healing is paved in metamorphosis. Outgrow yourself.

E-mail your fave no-holds-barred agri agony aunt

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Tags: Advise ColumnBreakupsFarmer AdviseHeartbreaksLiewe LuluLoveSetbacks
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Noluthando Ngcakani

Noluthando Ngcakani

With roots in the Northern Cape, this Kimberley Diamond has had a passion for telling human interest stories since she could speak her first words. A foodie by heart, she began her journalistic career as an intern at the SABC where she discovered her love for telling agricultural, community and nature related stories. Not a stranger to a challenge Ngcakani will go above and beyond to tell your truth.

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Farmer 101: Top tips to grow spring onions

How the Internet of Things is transforming agri

Drug dealer turned farmer ploughs back

Beat the winter blues with yummy butter chicken

Food may soon be cheaper. What’s the catch?

ICYMI: MEC lines up municipal support for farmers

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